Statue

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.

“Hurry!” she said, “stand in the corner.”

She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder.

“Don’t move until I tell you to,” she whispered. “Just pretend you’re a statue.”

“What’s this, honey?” the husband enquired as he entered the room.

“Oh, its just a statue,” she replied nonchalantly. “The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too.”

No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep.

Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.

“Here,” he said to the “statue”, “eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water.”

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  • 20 Comments »

    Comment by RateMyLeftArm.com
    2008-03-12 14:08:13
    MyAvatars 0.2

    haha.

     
    Comment by Chris Mikaitis Subscribed to comments via email
    2008-03-12 17:02:34
    MyAvatars 0.2

    Not that funny… clearly the wife knew about what happened with the ’smiths’, although maybe not knowing it involved her husband. So now the husband knew exactly what was happening…. whatever… I don’t need to explain it… there are better jokes out there…

    Comment by Chris Mikaitis
    2008-03-12 17:44:37
    MyAvatars 0.2

    you are lame

    Comment by David
    2008-03-13 14:26:59
    MyAvatars 0.2

    seconded

    Comment by anon
    2008-03-25 19:07:16
    MyAvatars 0.2

    thirded

    Comment by ton
    2008-04-08 00:21:11
    MyAvatars 0.2

    fourthded

    (Comments wont nest below this level)
    Comment by sam
    2008-04-11 16:24:50
    MyAvatars 0.2

    fifthed

     
    Comment by mike
    2008-04-12 09:03:10
    MyAvatars 0.2

    closed.
    but that was catchy

     
     
     
     
     
     
    Pingback by statue
    2008-03-13 18:30:42
    MyAvatars 0.2

    […] woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front […]

     
    Comment by PD
    2008-03-13 23:56:47
    MyAvatars 0.2

    The woman didn’t know that the “statue” next door was her husband because he hadn’t been caught (presumably)

     
    Comment by gord
    2008-03-15 04:24:17
    MyAvatars 0.2

    ok, i kinda liked it.

     
    Comment by ray
    2008-03-18 16:53:29
    MyAvatars 0.2

    it was funny! not haha funny, but fynny non the less

     
    Comment by alice
    2008-04-12 19:55:01
    MyAvatars 0.2

    how would that ever work… wouldnt he notice anyway when the statue left…

     
    Comment by Bri Subscribed to comments via email
    2008-04-14 03:48:20
    MyAvatars 0.2

    …Sixthed….

    Comment by George
    2008-04-14 21:09:59
    MyAvatars 0.2

    seventhed

     
     
    Comment by Prodnose Subscribed to comments via email
    2008-04-14 17:04:18
    MyAvatars 0.2

    Of course, what the husband should have said was “Is tat you?”
    (Bad… very bad….)

     
    Comment by FMDC
    2008-04-17 16:03:09
    MyAvatars 0.2

    What the fuck is wrong with you people? It’s a joke. It doesn’t need to be analyzed like it’s an alibi. I bet you’re the kinds of people that watch Looney Tunes and say, “rabbits can’t talk… this isn’t funny…”

     
    Comment by me
    2008-04-17 17:13:24
    MyAvatars 0.2

    I’m going to second FMDC. Its a joke. Its meant to be funny. Not sensible.

     
    Comment by me Subscribed to comments via email
    2008-04-18 23:26:11
    MyAvatars 0.2

    ok… I’m the first guy that hated this comic. I honestly can’t believe you all find this funny. You must be the kind of people that like ‘life with Jim” (or whatever the sitcom is called) and other sub-par comedies that aren’t very well thought out. I’m not saying this isn’t funny… I’m saying it couldn’t exist in reality. Seriously… why is this funny… all important parties know what is going on…. this is more of a testament to ignorance as anything else… I will get ‘eighthed’ for this… but Jesus tap dancing Christ… it’s really not funny… why would you support this?

     
    Comment by bec
    2008-04-19 15:57:09
    MyAvatars 0.2

    i thought it was ok

     
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