Statue

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.

“Hurry!” she said, “stand in the corner.”

She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder.

“Don’t move until I tell you to,” she whispered. “Just pretend you’re a statue.”

“What’s this, honey?” the husband enquired as he entered the room.

“Oh, its just a statue,” she replied nonchalantly. “The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too.”

No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep.

Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.

“Here,” he said to the “statue”, “eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water.”

Similar Jokes You may like

  • Why men should shut their mouth when not necessary to talk
  • Who are better friends, Men or Women??
  • I am married
  • A widow’s will
  • A snory story
  • { 19 comments… read them below or add one }

    RateMyLeftArm.com March 12, 2008 at 2:08 pm

    haha.

    Reply

    Chris Mikaitis March 12, 2008 at 5:02 pm

    Not that funny… clearly the wife knew about what happened with the ‘smiths’, although maybe not knowing it involved her husband. So now the husband knew exactly what was happening…. whatever… I don’t need to explain it… there are better jokes out there…

    Reply

    Chris Mikaitis March 12, 2008 at 5:44 pm

    you are lame

    Reply

    David March 13, 2008 at 2:26 pm

    seconded

    Reply

    anon March 25, 2008 at 7:07 pm

    thirded

    Reply

    ton April 8, 2008 at 12:21 am

    fourthded

    PD March 13, 2008 at 11:56 pm

    The woman didn’t know that the “statue” next door was her husband because he hadn’t been caught (presumably)

    Reply

    gord March 15, 2008 at 4:24 am

    ok, i kinda liked it.

    Reply

    ray March 18, 2008 at 4:53 pm

    it was funny! not haha funny, but fynny non the less

    Reply

    alice April 12, 2008 at 7:55 pm

    how would that ever work… wouldnt he notice anyway when the statue left…

    Reply

    Bri April 14, 2008 at 3:48 am

    …Sixthed….

    Reply

    George April 14, 2008 at 9:09 pm

    seventhed

    Reply

    Prodnose April 14, 2008 at 5:04 pm

    Of course, what the husband should have said was “Is tat you?”
    (Bad… very bad….)

    Reply

    FMDC April 17, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    What the fuck is wrong with you people? It’s a joke. It doesn’t need to be analyzed like it’s an alibi. I bet you’re the kinds of people that watch Looney Tunes and say, “rabbits can’t talk… this isn’t funny…”

    Reply

    me April 17, 2008 at 5:13 pm

    I’m going to second FMDC. Its a joke. Its meant to be funny. Not sensible.

    Reply

    me April 18, 2008 at 11:26 pm

    ok… I’m the first guy that hated this comic. I honestly can’t believe you all find this funny. You must be the kind of people that like ‘life with Jim” (or whatever the sitcom is called) and other sub-par comedies that aren’t very well thought out. I’m not saying this isn’t funny… I’m saying it couldn’t exist in reality. Seriously… why is this funny… all important parties know what is going on…. this is more of a testament to ignorance as anything else… I will get ‘eighthed’ for this… but Jesus tap dancing Christ… it’s really not funny… why would you support this?

    Reply

    bec April 19, 2008 at 3:57 pm

    i thought it was ok

    Reply

    sam April 11, 2008 at 4:24 pm

    fifthed

    Reply

    mike April 12, 2008 at 9:03 am

    closed.
    but that was catchy

    Reply

    Leave a Comment

    { 1 trackback }

    Previous post:

    Next post: