Bike Donut fail

New Evidence

The day after a verdict had been entered against his client, the lawyer rushed to the judge’s chambers, demanding that the case be reopened, saying: “I have new evidence that makes a huge difference in my client’s defence.” The judge asked, “What new evidence could you have?” The lawyer replied, “My client has an extra [...]

Kid Birthday Cake Fail

Harry Potter vs Twilight

How Far Away Were You?

A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The lawyer asked him, “Did you actually see the accident?” The witness: “Yes, sir.” The lawyer: “How far away were you when the accident happened?” The witness: “Thirty-one feet, six and one quarter inches.” The lawyer (thinking he’d trap the witness): “Well, sir, will you tell the [...]

What’s the price?

A lady walks into Tiffany’s. She browses around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn’t pop up [...]

Too Much Change

“Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market.” “Sounds like you may [...]

Puppy Won’t Bathe

Single

Imma Boop Your Head

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